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You cannot be right and love at the same time

I came across this quote this morning from Simon Sinek: Bad leaders care about who's right. Good leaders care about what's right.

People who care about being right can never be good leaders. Caring about what's right, however, keeps us open to the possibilities of solutions and what can work for the greater good.

I remember years ago living in a small neighbourhood near the Portsdown area here in Singapore, a group of us neighbours became good buddies, lunching together and doing things...

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Want true peace and happiness? Move from a fixed to a growth mindset

It's been said that you can't teach old dogs new tricks. As my dog gets older, he's behaving like an archetypal middle-aged man, grumpy and stubborn. People say that about people too that as we get older, we become fixed in our ways, but is this really true?

I would like to think that as people, we are better than that. 

Have you read the book Mindset? The book explains that there are two kinds of mindsets - the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. However, the fixed mindset can be...

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Pseudo Enlightenment and the Unhealed Teacher/Coach/Healer

One of the most dangerous/amusing things about the path of spirituality, or personal development, is when someone gets a small glimpse of the light (read: wisdom). They are suddenly aware of something, usually about the universe or the world, and they feel as if the world has opened up for them. They get excited as they perceive this light, and they think that others have not perceived this, so they go excitedly telling others about this.

If they are able to contain it, they may allow this...

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Obstacles to healing

One of the biggest obstacles to healing is when you're given a cookie-cutter answer or solution to something that is uniquely your experience. Have you ever experienced this?

Now, most of our problems are similar in the sense that there is a baseline in what kinds of thoughts/emotions surface in our experiences. However what makes us unique is how we experience our challenges, problems or trauma. We all carry different understanding, perspectives, and even our family background plays such an...

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The actual meaning behind self care

Whenever we say self-care, people tend to think, it's about sleeping in, eating well, not doing any work. 

Self-care is more than that. Self-care is also caring about what kinds of thoughts and emotions we allow ourselves to entertain and fester. 

If we entertain thoughts that are unhealthy for us, by focusing on the negatives about ourselves, about others and situations while lying in bed, that's not self-care. That's an even more toxic environment we have created for ourselves....

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The Season of Renewal

We have just entered a season of renewal. What does this mean?

It means that the past few months have been good at helping us to re-evaluate our lives, our priorities, our interests and so on. If you're still at the stage of re-evaluation, it is perfectly fine too, because this season of renewal is going to be with us for the next few months. Have you been feeling it?

The process of renewal is gradual, it is not as if we will hit a button and everything changes, we are spiritual beings...

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Self belief & our inner child

Yesterday I conducted a poll on my social media accounts. One question I asked is: Which is more difficult for you: A- saying no to other people or B-Believing in yourself. Majority of the respondents on Instagram chose: Believing in yourself.
 
Self-belief is one of the biggest hurdles we all need to cross. And when this part of the mental construct of our self is not complete, we will keep feeling handicapped.
 
So let's go back to basics.
 
For most of us...
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What do you do to avoid truth?

Uncategorized Jul 26, 2020

What do you do to avoid truth?

We all do this. We do things, say things to avoid the truth.

Sometimes the truth is too much that we unconsciously block them, or avoid them, or we just don’t want to see them because the truth is not acceptable by our peers, by society or by our family.

We dishonour ourselves and our inner truths to please the world, which leaves us hollow and unhappy.

Have you experienced this? I am sure all of us have, at one time or another.

Sometimes, acknowledging...

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Work THROUGH your feelings/thoughts, not away from them

A client asked me recently if we should just ignore feelings and thoughts of the past when we are trying to move on and learn our lessons in life? This is what I told her: 

No, of course, we do not ignore them. They surfaced for a reason and we must pay attention to how our emotions, our energies and our physical and subtle bodies respond to different situations and circumstance in life. 

Our body systems have intelligence, and by ignoring them, we are missing out on a whole lot of...

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You never had control, all you had was anxiety

I came across this quote (by Elizabeth Gilbert) on socials yesterday:

You are afraid of surrender because you don't want to lose control. But you never had control; all you had was anxiety.

Isn't this just too true?

Whenever we face a challenge in our lives, whether it is work, our health, relationships or just life in general, we feel like it is so hard to surrender to what IS. And what is really in store for us, and we want to plan everything, we want to control everything. Because we...

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